过来松个土

看到一个姑娘在weibo上说”I miss those days when blogging was still cool.” 想起了140字以上我还有这么个地盘可以撒欢。
首先,我居然没有忘记网址。然后,发现人家服务器都“完成了从西雅图的搬迁,请重新解析您的域名至******”。(For god’s sake, I never knew that you were in Seattle anyway.) 于是,重新解析域名。(For god’s sake again, what the hell does that mean?)依稀记得老吴讲解过整个步骤,遂翻出聊天纪录。在此感谢我孤僻的性格让我成为一个跟外部世界断了联系的人,我跟朋友们的聊天纪录是如此之少以至于我总是能记得我们说了些啥以及我在紧急情况需要调用这些说的话的时候能够从寥寥数页里不费吹灰之力把它找出来。一步,两步,三步,成功登录。接下来的两分钟里我瞪大了眼睛盯着我的草稿箱,我到底是一个怎样的不能持之以恒的话痨才能容忍自己在草稿箱里堆压这么多半途而废的话语。

听说新年要常立志,立长志。作为一个审美略土,喜欢old-fashion,永远赶不上趟也不喜欢顺着潮流走的人,我决定在看了一篇讨论”博客已死”的文章两天后,立志把这个140字以上的地盘打扫出来。也许一个原因是最近莫名其妙地开始怀旧,开始疯狂地想念所有那些在时光的河流中逝去不可得的人事物,回到这里可以让我离河的对岸稍近一点儿,隔着层层水雾哀悼一下那些有话就说有逼就装有情就矫的年少轻狂。另一个原因,或许只是自说自话的欲望被突然闲下来的生活步调重新唤醒。最近在读的一本 Travels with Charley 中,开篇John Steinbeck 写道:
When I was very young and the urge to be someplace else was on me, I was assured by mature people that maturity would cure this itch. When years described me as mature, the remedy prescribed was middle age. In middle age I was assured that greater age would calm my fever and now that I am fifty-eight perhaps senility will do the job. Nothing has worked.
把”to be someplace else”换成 “to say something”就是我的写照。一个资深话痨,曾以为时间能治这病。长年累月的抗争中,我败了。于是决定顺其自然,let it flow.

Grey’s Anatomy S09E09

Before the wedding.
Baily: I just feel worried. I never felt that way when I was with Tucker.
Webber: You were just a child when you married Tucker. You are an adult now. You know the world’s an ambiguous place. You know that love doesn’t conquer all. It conquers some stuff. The other stuff kicks the living crap out of love.
Baily: And this is the pep talk?
Webber: Overwhelming doubt is a problem. A little bit doubt is just a sign of intelligent adult.

《One Day》

终于读完了《One Day》.这恐怕是迄今为止我在课本以外能坚持下来的最厚的一本英语书了。(其实也没多厚好吗!)

之前看过小说改编的电影,由Anne Hathaway (女神!撒花!)和Jim Sturgess主演。我必须承认我跟保守估计约百分之八十的群众一样是被那张文艺唯美浪漫小资的海报勾去看的。看完之后我说:“想不出有什么比流水账更适合用来表现爱情。”是的,电影就是一本流水账,在行文结构上对原著小说忠实到令人发指的地步。书里分五大章二十三小节,每一节只写一天的事情,而且是每一年的同一天–7月15日,男女主角初相识的日子。就这么一年一天地写了二十年,两个人的半辈子。但就是这么机械般的一年一年的流水故事看到后来却自有一番动人于无形的力量,那是时间本身具有的张力。润物细无声。

相对于书,电影在对白方面略胜一筹。在我有限的阅读观影范围内,这是我能想出的由小说改为电影后人物对话改编得相当成功的一部。它并没有让演员们背诵原文已有的对白,根据电影语言的特点作了修改。”A tortilla is either corn or wheat. But a corn tortilla folded and filled is a taco, whereas a filled wheat tortilla is a burrito. Deep fry a burrito, it’s a chimichanga. Toast a tortilla, it’s a tostada. Roll it, it’s an enchilada.” 相信所有看过电影的人都对这段话有深刻印象。Brilliant & Hilarious!

然而电影毕竟受限于长度,无法像书那样细致入微,面面俱到。要将二十年光阴浓缩在100分钟里,实在是个技术活。因而我可以理解导演将爱情作为主线,把它拍成了一曲悠长的恋歌。但读过原文后,却觉得爱情在这个故事里只能退居次席。这其实讲述的是一对青年男女二十年各自历练成长的故事。It is more of a story about a woman’s grow-up rather than merely a love tale. Love is not tolerance. Love is not sacrifice. Love is a way to a complement during which two people inspires each other to find the “hidden me”, to become the best individual they could ever expect to be. 作者最打动我的地方在于他对年轻人心理的准确把握,那种初出校园未经世事的豪情与一无所有的不安共存的复杂情绪,在理想与现实落差面前的迷惘在诱惑浮华面前的迷失。不否认爱在这一过程中呈现的力量,却也不能狭隘地归于男女之情。事实上我相信这世上绝大部分爱情都不是纯粹的男女之情,天时地利人和的讲究下,这是一件差之毫厘失之千里的事儿。退一步亲人,进一步情人。

书中开头和结尾呼应的一段话

‘Live each day as if it’s your last’,that was the conventional advice, but really, who had the energy for that? What if it rained or you felt a bit glandy? It just wasn’t practical. Better by far to simply try and be good and courageous and hold and to make difference. Not change the world exactly, but the little bit around you. Go out there with your passion and your electric typewriter and work hard at…something. Change lives through art maybe. Cherish your friends, stay true to your principles, live passionately and fully and well. Experience new things. Love and be loved, if you ever get the chance.

2012Thxgiving@DC(一)

来岛上的第四个感恩节了。
第一年临近期末(废话,哪一年不是),憋在寝室里闷头赶project和paper。感谢游哥的大力协助,我把一堆原材料丢给他,自己打paper去了。他愣是在起早贪黑忙申请的间隙熬夜帮我做掉了那个project.然后感恩节当天我们在各自只睡了三小时的前提下进城看了Macy’s parade,逛了哥大,瞻仰了华尔街但没有找到传说中的金牛,夜探中国城,半夜十点在黑人大哥们的注视下匆匆而行。
第二年在波士顿,结识了一些至今保持联系对我而言很重要的新朋,第三年在芝加哥,与璐璐Paul哥小包一帮旧友团圆。今年直到假期的前一周都没有任何打算,本以为会不了了之。某日突然冒出念头还是去周边走走吧。冬天万物萧瑟,适合城市观光。在DC与Boston之间徘徊了一会儿后觉得还是DC可看的东西较多。且基本免费。遂上路。

一早出发,大概下午两点到了海港城市Baltimore.之前来过一次去的是它那儿最繁华的harbor area,也是途径,驻留了仅三小时,没有真正深入市内感受该城本质。这次从高速一路下来穿梭进主城区才真正体会到此处以黑人多治安乱出名所言不虚。整个城市散发着一种阴森恐怖的死城气氛。没进城多久就看到一堆警车停在一栋小房子外,我脑海中立刻浮现出一些侦查片的剧情和画面,配上节奏紧凑的背景音乐。
午饭在John Hopkins University外一家韩日料理吃的。点了一份韩式海鲜饭,只因觉得来了海港城市不吃海鲜实在说不过去。

饕餮后去JHU逛了逛,在某一校门外看到了这样一个雕像IMG_9153 copy 敏感部位油光呈亮的,只是不懂这么高是怎样能办到。

JHU Library
IMG_9186 copy

校园不大,走了一圈天色已晚,夜色中继续赶往DC.

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更多图片烦请戳这里–>我的Flickr

11-18-2012

最近重新把Grey’s Anatomy捡起来看。上次看这部剧还是在国内念大二的时候,受两个格蕾死忠粉室友的影响。后来因为剧情越来越往医院版Gossip Girl的狗血方向发展便觉索然无味,弃之。
这次从最新的第九季开始看,惊喜地发现编剧终于从A上了B,B搞了C,C睡了D的循环往复中走了出来,重新发掘一些男欢女爱之外的东西。
既是医院的故事,生死自是永远绕不开的主题。一场坠机将本就不轻松的剧情推向了更下层的深渊。每一集都有人离开,因着这样那样的原因,意料之中或意料之外。第五集那个可爱的老古董在手术进行中突然倒地时整颗心像被人用铁索绞住一样,不断勒紧、勒紧。年岁越长越看不得这些生离死别的故事,因为你知道这些都是真实发生的,是世界上各个角落里正在进行的剧情。无人幸免,无处躲藏。So sad to know that we are born to die.

昨天看了Cloud Atlas.三个小时高潮迭起六个不同时代的故事相互穿插,间夹着黑人英语白人英语亚洲英语古英语未来世界的奇怪英语,我居然困意全无地看了下来,而且完全陷进了这个构建出的杂而不乱的世界。剪辑和化妆都值得观众起立鼓掌三分钟。最后出字幕的时候特意将每个演员演的所有角色总结给观众看,尽管知道一人分饰多角是卖点之一,还是忍不住频频惊呼“这个居然是他!这个也是她演的!”
除开流畅的剪辑,精妙的化妆,恰当的配乐以及演员到位的演技,故事本身也是无可挑剔。六个故事表面上毫无关系的故事通过一些很巧妙的细节串了起来,像六张独立的卡片挂在同一条看不见丝线上。泪点和笑点都埋得恰到好处。宏大的视角跌宕的情节汹涌的情感配上平静的独白,我无法对这种套路免疫。

都是关乎人性与爱恨生死,如格蕾那样的故事是从细处入手剖析真实生活,而如云图这样的故事则是站在一定高度从大处入手铺开一副表现普世大爱、自由、反抗等恢弘主题的画卷。两者都能直指人心。

与我而言该电影最大问题在于见血太多。分级是R级,还是没做好充分的心理准备。而且这些过于直面血腥的镜头在我看来大多数是没有必要的。
待有机会重新看一遍,彼时故事脉络已然清晰,心情也当放松一些,手上拿着一份演员表一一对照,将他们分饰的所有角色从屏幕上找出,想来会有趣的很。

昨晚看完电影照例去HX家吃了个便饭。关了灯听他的吉他独奏。一曲《将进酒》比之一年前第一次听到颇有进步。“钟鼓馔玉不足贵,但愿长醉不复醒。”“与君歌一曲,请君为我倾耳听。”“古来圣贤皆寂寞,惟有饮者留其名。” 倒不是多动人的嗓音,也不见得是多精湛的技巧,但每次HX的弹唱总让我有想哭的冲动。也许是因为无论是校园民谣小清新,豪迈奔放的古诗词,还是嘻哈的流氓歌曲,吟唱出的每一句他都真的很投入感情。当他昨晚和蔡师兄合唱起“老男孩”那首歌,我红着眼睛半天回不过神。有些时光太美好,美好到当下显得如此不真实。配上这种怀旧的歌曲,让人想到某一天终会曲终人散场,怀旧变得真实,过往变得刻骨铭心却再也触不可及。聚散什么的,总是件矫情事。

当Young逃离了西雅图后Mer给她了一段电话留言:
This is a place where horrible things happen. You were right to go. You were probably escaping disasters. Look at me. I practically grew up here. And you’re right. It hurt me. In ways I’ll probably never get over. I’ve a lot of memories of people. People I’ve lost forever. But I have a lot of other memories too. This is the place where I fell in love. The place where I found my family. This is where I learnt to be a doctor, where I learned how to take responsibilities for someone else’s life. And it’s the place I met you. So I figure this place has given me as much as it’s taken from me. I’ve lived here as much as I’ve survived here. It just depends on how I look at it. I’m gonna choose to look at it that way and remember you that way.

对我来说这个”place”不单指Seattle Grace Hospital, 不单指Seattle, 指的更是此时此地的生活,此处的世界。我也曾在很长一段时间里,拼命地想要逃离一些东西而不得。最终也只有与之妥协。失望希望奋进颓唐,有被生活感动地觉得世界太美好阳光太明亮一生太漫长,也有被生活恶心到想fuck it up. 我想在某一天我终究会离开所有我曾憎恨曾热爱曾赋予一切最撕心裂肺付诸最强烈情感的那些人事物,所有那些“has given me as much as it’s taken from me”的日子。也许我也能在那一刻坦然说出“I’ve lived here as much as I’ve survived here.”

What are you looking for in a lover

Yesterday, I read about two girls’ opinions on love.


AND HOLD MY HAND. –added by the girl who posted the pic.

I ran into another article the other day. (What do you look for in your lover–by PY)

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For me,
You don’t need to be rich in pocket but better rich in mind.
Let’s face the fact that life can be boring at times and that’s why it’s of great importance to date someone interesting.
Rationally outside but emotionally inside. I am not good at dealing with machines. Nor am I energetic enough to be high all the way.
I am not looking for a genius but please be smart enough to get my jokes.
I’m not seeking for a movie star with awesome figure and handsome face. All I need is a pretty smile and a healthy body.
I don’t expect you to turn around and merge your way into mine. But if the road you are exploring on happens to be parallel with the one I am seeking to, shall we walk side by side and hand in hand, to see what’s hidden at the end?

You are a good guy without me, but you don’t refuse the chance to get better by having me.

民子说更博频率比不上WP版本更新频率是一件耻辱的事

我笑了。

我不说你们也看得出来我更博的频率也只能欺负一下Windows操作系统更新的频率了。

    Mars rover “Curiosity” landed down successfully yesterday and I was so impressed by a series of pics on the internet regarding this. (http://www.bbc.co.uk/zhongwen/simp/multimedia/2012/08/120806_pic_nasa3.shtml). Like one of my friends said to me: “Those cheerful scenes when glory moments of triumphs of human being happens always fill tears of joy in my eyes.” Look at the fourth pic. Could you hear the peaceful as well as powerful song hanging around when a life dream come true? It’s interesting that at such a moment usually the silence and peace take the charge when a person is supposed to be excited and out of control. That’s the moment when words fail and we get lost in the power of silence.

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Mark 一本书–Grace & Grit, by Ken Wilber.

    “I am immeasurably more, and immeasurably less, because of her presence. Immeasurably more, for having known her; immeasurably less, for having lost her. But then, perhaps every event in life is like that: filling you up and emptying you out, all at the same time. It is just that, it is oh-so-rare that such a one as Treya is with us, and thus the joy, and the pain, are all so intensely amplified. ”  

为了这段开头,我下了英文版。

中文版居然是胡因梦和别人合译的。对,你没想错,就是那个演过电影嫁过李敖的胡因梦。

为了这个名字,我又下了中文版。

读完必须写点儿什么,特此存证。这一年翻了不少书,却一直未能将输入转为输出。

顺便说一句,我草稿箱的东西远多于摆在台面上的。这也是一件耻辱的事。